February

Bobbo the Clown

This is the story of Bobbo Roberts, also known as Bobbo the clown, born into one of the oldest circus families in the world.

The Robert Brothers Circus was established by brothers Tommy and Bobby Roberts in Falkirk, Scotland in 1944 and became one of the most successful circuses in Britain and Ireland

The Robert Brothers Circus provided traditional circus entertainment including animal acts and were very famous for their horses and elephants. They travelled their shows around Britain and Ireland all year round either tenting during the summer or at indoor venues through the winter with regular appearances at Kelvin Hall during the Christmas season.

Bobbo the clown, or Bobby Roberts, was born into the circus, the son of circus proprietors Bobby and Moira Roberts.  After starting off with a horse and dog act. He started clowning age 13 and with the help of his uncle Jack Fossett and Rastelli Clowns, Bobbo started clowning as well as unicycling and juggling. 

Bobbo was born in Blackburn. His granddad was German and his grandmother a Russian Jew.  One was immersed in the world of the music hall and the other the Circus, so Bobbo was born with showbiz in his blood as they say but as he said, “when you shake me its sawdust that falls out”.

I had the pleasure of interviewing Bobbo and I asked him about his current role in performing as a comedy act on his own and his childhood growing up in the circus:

Well first thing is I am from a long line of circus performers and I'm proud to say one which you can trace back many years.   I am not saying this to be big headed, but do you know the saying ‘you can't teach an old dog new tricks?’ well I firmly believe you can and it’s only the last couple of years I've got to do many things apart from my clowning. 

I've always had a love of the past and the history of show business like the music hall and burlesque and I've been lucky to have got to tick of comedy from my bucket list so let's take it from there and maybe in a few weeks’ times I will talk about my time in the sawdust ring.  

A few years ago, a lady I’ve known for a long time sent me a message saying she would like to book me as a comedian and to come along and do a couple of 5 minute spots. 

I said okay but she then dropped the bombshell… she didn’t want me to perform with my red nose and familiar make up, she wanted me to turn up as myself!    I protested and said "no I can't!" I needed to hide behind my nose and  make-up! She then went on to say “look I've seen you messing about and folk laughing without your make-up so I know you can do it”, so eventually I agreed but I got thinking I just can't do it as nobody will find me funny and I thought,  what's the big deal it's only a piece of rubber and some make-up and I’m convinced that Bobbo is more brave then Bobby as he's confident and in charge.

So on the night of the performance I took my props and  make-up along as I had a plan in my head that I will wear it on stage but the lady in question got wind of my idea and took my make-up box away.   I begged and begged and finally she agreed I could use my base and eye liner, so I felt a tiny bit better and to cut a long story shorter I gave it my all on stage with a few bits of funny material and adlib and it went very well so from then on, I ask when I do gigs do you want me Bobby or Bobbo?. I found that I loved the freedom of not being the clown all the time as I can get away with slight risqué jokes.

Now a story from my childhood, well one I’m fond of telling, is about a time myself and my circus family were in Jersey.  We were having to do a street parade to drum up business for the up-and-coming week of the circus.  My sister and I are riding the elephants, and my dad walking in front of us.  My dad is sniffing and he says to the man who used to clean the elephants and was not that clean himself.” ALFIE have you soiled your pants?” Alfie said he hadn’t, and my dad said” Are you sure you haven’t?” and Alfie says “no, I haven’t!”

So, my dad being the sarcastic man he was then said, “prove it?” so Alfie drops his trousers, and my dad says, “look you have shat yourself!” and Alfie looks my dad in the eye and says “Not today!"

Me and my sister just fell of the elephant s laughing our heads off.

Bobby Roberts 

Kirsty Lynch burst onto the comedy scene at The Stand in October 2022. She has continued to push forward performing at The Fringe and Manchester Women in Comedy Festival in 2023. Now, with a sell out debut solo show behind her, as well as Giggles from Glesga compilation show, Kirsty has taken to the scene like the legend she is. Here we challenge Kirsty to our very first Comedy Corner Questions - lets probe Kirsty!

​​Photo credit: www.silverzephyrmedia.com

Comedy Corner

​

 1.  Who are you?

My name is Kirsty Lynch, I’m a 45 year old mum of one human and have a fur baby. I’m married to my bit of rough Stephen and we will be celebrating 14 years married in August. I’ve been doing stand up for just over 2 years and have loved the people I’ve met and experiences it has given me. It was something I wanted to tick off the bucket list and had no idea where it would go.

   2.  Why are you funny?

My life has been full of different experiences where anything that could go wrong often has and like most Scottish people you can see the funny side of it. So having this as the basis of my comedy is what I think helps make me funny as a lot of people can relate to it.

  3.  Who or what makes you laugh? (this is one question, right!

Kids! Because they say it as they see it. There is never malice behind any of their cheek and their timing is often perfect – I include my teenage daughter in that, they’re hilarious.

  4.  What is your unfulfilled ambition?

To combine two of the things I love and to do: I would love to perfrom comedy in my dream destination of Australia. I haven been lucky to visit Australia twice before, with my family and have such brilliant memories from being there. I would love to see if my ability to make people laugh travels down under.

   5.  From the random generated images below, what image are you most drawn to and why?

The sunset! I believe I should have been born in a warm country and I love being on a beach watching the sun go down, with a cold glass of, well any fruity alcohol cocktail, aaaah.

​6.  Settle a score from life or comedy, apologise or agitate. Tell us all something nobody knows about you, that secret that you want to share, the grudge you hold, that hate you keep deep down?

I was at a friends wedding a while back, it was a great day but one of my pals was being a wee bit snidey about some of the guests. When we were posing for a picture, my friend was bent down in front of me, to sort her shoe or something, who knows. I sort of accidentally banged into her and she tumbled down the hill. I was in stitches. I love her but she can be a wee bit passive aggressive too, maybe it was the fruity cocktails that got to me. Was it an accident, or did I mean for her bum to flip down that hill????

 by Yvonne Hughes 

Stand up Journeys:  John O'Brien 

Who are you?

This sounds like an easy question however does anybody know who they really are? I reckon we all have huge potential but we end up developing a character to survive in the environment we are brought up in. The secret is to realise that we are not the character we have developed but the amazing person who created the character. Shit. That's was deep. Calm down Obie.

How did you get into comedy?

I always wanted to do comedy but had no idea how to get into it. In a bout 1999 I remember seeing a small story in The Sunday Mail about a woman doing a comedy workshop in Glasgow. As soon as I seen that I knew I had to do it. I signed up and done Viv Gees second ever comedy workshop, done my first gig, started doing open spots for a few years until I was good enough to get paid to do it.

What did you do before comedy?

Loads of stuff. Before I got into comedy I went to university for 4 years and got a degree in manufacturing engineering and management. I have had people ask me over the years if I thought that was a waste of time if I didn’t pursue engineering as a career. No chance. I had great fun over 4 years and have loads of good stories that I can use as comedy material. Every past experience is an asset as a comedian.

First gig?

My first gig was in Blackfriars in MErchant City. It was the end of Viv Gees comedy workshop. I think it went ok but it was probably shit. I had 6 pints before going on stage 🙂

Favourite gig?

 I don’t have a specific favourite gig that I remember. Loads that I remember where I got a good buzz from it. One I do remember if a late night solo show in the Beehive Inn. There was just a good buzz in the room. At one point an audience member made me laugh for about 10 minutes. I had the giggles and it spread round the room. It was one of those gigs where I got about 45 minutes in and realised I hadn’t done any material yet. Gigs like that are the most fun.

Worst gig?

Thanks for bringing back the PTSD :) Ill throw in a point here before I tell you. I reckon a big turning point in my comedy career was when I didn’t get effected by bad gigs any more. In my first few years if I had a bad gig, a bad review etc it would really effect me maybe for a few weeks. I’m sure I gave up for 6 monts near the start after some bad gigs and promoters telling me I was shit. Now if I have a bad gig I give myself 10 minutes to analyse why it didn’t work. I learn from it and move on.

Anyway one of my worst gigs was a gig on a boxing night. It was a night where there was loads of amature   boxing fights on. I was put on after a guy doing a raffle and during the break. I was basically in the middle of the ring doing stand up while people were talking, going to the bar and going out for a cigarette. Great fun. The only person who laughed that night was a guy outside when I was waiting for a taxi pointing and laughing and saying “hahahah  I seen you getting paid for that shit”

Any advice for new acts? Write loads, hunners or stage time, watch the experienced acts, do loads of shit holes and gig in different places. Study how comedy works etc. Don’t stand on your laughs. That means shut the fuck up when the audience are laughing.

How do you come up with material?

My material happens sporadically. I generally come up with ideas and mess about with them on stage until it becomes a bit. I could become more disciplined with writing but this is how I do it at the moment. I have never ever written stuff word for word. My notes exist as bullet points.

What makes you laugh?

I reckon things that make me laugh the most are things that happen in the moment. I have always thought the best moments in comedy always happen in the moment and are very hard to replicate.

Most memorable experience in your career?

I have loads of these. Probably the first time I managed to go to Australia years ago. I was completely skint a few months before it. I decided I was going to go no matter what. The determination and delusional confidence at the time got me there despite most people telling me I was mental and I had no chance of making it over there.

Have you ever died on stage?

Yes of course. Hunners of times :) I remember one gig where I died so bad and after the show some audience members came up and shook the hands of all the comedians who were on and said how good it was. When they got to me they put their head down and moved on :} One of the other comics gave me a hug as I came off stage.

What's the best audience?

A good Edinburgh festival audience who are on their second drink and don’t take life too seriously.

Think that’s the end of the questions. I have now been doing comedy for 26 years and I can honestly say that I have never lost the passion for it. I think no matter how long you do something there is always something new to learn. If you are only a few years in and you think you have mastered it you haven’t. I see different comedians all the time that do something I wish had came up with.

Anyway my next project  as a comedian is to build more of an audience with social media and trying new things. My next solo show is called Door to door comedian on the 22nd of MArch in the Flying Duck at 2:30 PM. I have this idea of selling tour shows door to door and talking about my interactions and results on stage.

John O'Brien 

The Man-o-Pause Diaries

Stephen Hughes January 2025

Let’s Talk Pants

As a gay man hurtling towards fifty quicker than a menopausal woman's short temper, I find myself getting more and more annoyed at the little things in life.  I think it’s the man-o-pause, but back in my day I think we just called it a mid-life crisis.  A time of life where you shave what’s left of your hair and buy a motorbike.  But just for information the man-o-pause is a real condition, I saw it on Good Morning Britain so it must be true.

This week it has been pants that have been mostly annoying me.  As a man the life cycle of pants is normally fairly simple - as a child your mum buys them, maybe the seven pairs of multi-coloured briefs for a fiver from Asda.  You then progress to the Superman or Spiderman briefs again lovingly procured by your mother.  As you move into adolescence and the hint of a pubic hair you progress to boxer briefs, Asda may again play a role here although it is sometimes and early progression into the designer pants again purchased  by mother.  Post puberty there is a definite delve into designer and Calvins are the most likely option, probable and most likely still bought by mum.

As an adult male there are two options - you continue to buy the same mum bought pants or you find a brand you like yourself and you stick with it.  I am of the second ilk, and found designer pants I liked, they fitted and generally lasted as required.  Having stuck with this designer brand throughout adulthood I have noticed recently that the fit is just not the same.  Now I think one of the reasons for this is the cost of living crisis has caused designers to reduce the fabric in said underwear.  Before I give you the next reason, here is a little medical fact for you - two parts of a man's body continue to grow his whole life, his earlobes and his scrotum.  Given you don’t need to cover your earlobes this is a problem.

Experiencing a distinct lack of adequate sackage I thought I’d treat myself and try some new underwear.  Scouring the internet I bought a few different brands to test the bawbag potential.  Boss were the first to arrive, nicely packaged unlike the package they were about to engulf.  On trying it was soon clear that sackage had never been considered.  Less than three minutes on and I felt like I was wearing some medieval torture device, these were soon removed and slung on the floor as is mandatory for men.  Next on the list were Moschino, having purchased other items of this brand I was living in hope.  Out of the packet and literally pulled over my thighs like a burst wet balloon, these were definitely not for me.  Maybe it was the sizing but these were just the same as the Asda briefs and would have fitted me as a five year old.

I have reverted back to my original brand and have resigned myself to the fact that as I age the room to breathe will continue to get less, like the rest of me I suppose.  Note to designers - sackage room is an issue as you age.  So now not only am I about three centimetres away from my bawbag hitting the water when I sit on the toilet, I am currently raiding the attic to find the 1982 Littlewoods catalogue and ordering myself some good old adequately sackaged white Y fronts!

A Day in the Life 

Robert Cross 

Having spent a number of years as a support worker assisting adults with complex needs, learning difficulties and physical disabilities I have been in many situations which have caused me to snigger – although seldom at the time. 

What has two eyes and smells of urine ? - Airdrie !     Yes, it is an old gag and possibly a tad unfair – but it is certainly not the most fragrant town in Scotland.   My story involves a Holy Communion which took place in the Lanarkshire town a few years back.    Now Airdrie is not the most religious of towns and the children can be a bit wild – in fact it is one of the few towns in Scotland where they sell communion dresses in ivory.

I was supporting a gent in his sixties – who, after a serious brain injury, has no filter and inappropriate comments are never far from his mouth.  A lovely fellow, we will call him David – not his real name (that is Stewart).  Stewart had been invited to his nieces  First Communion and he was delighted to attend the ceremony  and support young Theresa – a very proud uncle indeed.

On leaving the chapel Stewart’s sister, Rebecca, had a surprise arranged for her daughter and two of her friends.   A beautiful, white stretch limousine was parked and Theresa and her two friends could hardly contain their excitement.  “Please can Uncle Stewart come with us in the limo ?” Asked Theresa looking at her mum with doe eyes.   “Of course !” answered her mum to cheers from the three girls “and Bob can come too.”  

As we settled ourselves into the vehicle our driver asked what music he should play. Now, despite his advancing years our hero loves his dance music and had introduced his young niece to bands such as The Chemical Brothers, Faithless , The Prodigy etc. so I was not surprised when the excited eight year old pressed her uncle to select a musical track.   There was a pause and a silent anticipation as we waited on Stewarts selection.    “Smack My Bitch Up by the Prodigy !! “ exclaimed Stewart to my horror.   Stewarts sister looked as if she had just watched someone set fire to a baby in a pram !  “Not really appropriate “ I explained, but my protestations went unheard due to the excited girls bursting into song !

Our driver had located the track and pressed play – all before Rebecca had managed to regain the power of speech.

Here I was in a limo with a pensioner dancing with three wee girls in baby wedding dresses who were singing “Smack My Bitch Up” at the top of their voices while the only other responsible adults sat there in absolute shock.

I am sure you have this surreal and unseemly image in your head.   I would like you to keep this with you as you learn what happened next.

I noticed light coming in at the door adjacent to where I was sitting, then the door opened – I could not hear what the Priest said – but it may well have been a profanity.   The parents of Theresa's friends were standing behind the shocked clergyman wondering what was going on.

The priest squinted his eyes and leaned over to me – his face inches from mine,      “I don't  believe I have met YOU before “ he snarled.  “Good morning father, no , we have not had the pleasure – I am a member of The Church of Scotland.”

“That figures “ said the man of god as he shut the car door.

On The Road with Michael Herd

Shanghai Comedy Scene

Having lived for 14 years in Shanghai, China and returning to live in Scotland in July 2022, my comedy experiences were shaped from my time living in the Middle Kingdom. It forms a central part of my act and is certainly the aspect which piques the most interest amongst audience members, particularly when talking about cultural clashes between myself and my Chinese wife Lulu and raising our multi-cultural son with a blended culture here in Scotland. Much of this was referenced in my previous Edinburgh Fringe show “Deep Shanghai’d” where I basically talked about how China has influenced who I am and my outlook on life. But the purpose of this piece here is to tell you a bit more about the comedy scene in China!

There are very stark differences in the comedy scenes of China and the UK more widely. For starters, China in general is playing catch up to countries which have long established comedy scenes (namely New York, London, Australia ), but has been growing at a rapid pace. Notable brands include Spicy Comedy and Comedy UN, who both run gigs in both Mandarin and Chinese, featuring a mix of acts both local and international performing across all gigs. Top Chinese bilingual acts to look out for include Norah Yang, Storm Xu, Qin Wang, Alvin Liu and Huang He, who bring in huge sell out audiences to their 4 times a week showcases across multiple cities, clearly reflecting the growing demand for comedy as an industry and that the good people of China clearly have a sense of humour! Where differences play out is in censorship – as a Communist dictatorship with tight controls on free speech, there are limits on what you can and cannot talk about (as this Chinese comedian House found out to his cost). Indeed, all performances strictly speaking have to be approved in advance by the Ministry of Culture, who vet all acts sets to ensure that there is nothing that will be critical of the government or breaches government positions on the so called “3 T’” (you are welcome to google what that means for yourself). In other words, play the game and you will be fine – as a foreigner living in China, and choosing therefore to accept the regime’s policies as part and parcel of the deal to live and work there, whether we agree with those positions or not is irrelevant – you’re expected to respect those rules and try not to poke the bear. 

Largely as a foreigner in this sort of culture, where there exists a huge expat scene, audiences largely comprised a mix of English speaking locals and others from all over the world. Being able to create relatable, universal humour was key (good practice ahead of ever performing in Edinburgh at any time of the year!). It could be easy to play on lazy stereotypes from other countries and get laughs you probably didn’t deserve (how many times other comics would try to “joke” after I would come off stage “did you understand him?? Does that guy even speak English” – yawn) but in general, audiences were receptive and the scenes were welcoming. Aside from the self proclaimed “Godfather” of English comedy in China attempting to create a sort of comedy apartheid by insisting that if the comics he booked were to perform at the rival club to his, they wouldn’t be welcome back (and insisting this happened the world over – spoiler alert, it doesn’t and likely only in his mind), the scene was open and opportunities for progression were available, far moreso than in comparison with the UK. What China’s comedy scene was good for was building chops and working out jokes but the scene was, and still is, in too much of an infancy with English comedy for it to be taken too seriously beyond it’s borders. Still, it was where I was first able to perform a full solo hour, running my first headline spot in the former capital city of Nanjing, which to this day remains one of the best and most fun crowds I have performed to and gave me my first experience of running a gig, laying the foundations for Front Tier Comedy to emerge. China’s comedy scene has a long way to go, but there have been brilliant acts that have made it part of their comedy career. Des Bishop famously came to China to immerse himself in Chinese language so that he could translate his act for this wider market. If there is any act who has nailed the whole “I used to live in China” premise, then checking out his Youtube special is good proof of that.

I went back to China in July 2023 for a family holiday for 5 weeks and did 2 sold out headliner shows in Beijing, previewing Deep Shanghai’d. It would be nearly a year later when I would do another lengthy headliner set, that time in Dingwall in the Scottish Highlands. Performing to 100 or so people in Beijing to then going to do a mic in Dingwall was quite an interesting experience. My comedy career has therefore taken me from the Great Wall to Dingwall!

Mike Herd

GAMING 

BY Euan Scarlett

You might be asking yourself, what do games have to do with comedy? It’s important to understand all types of popular culture as a comedian. During my lifetime the games industry has grown from what was considered, outside of Japan, something only for kids and maladjusted adult men, to be the biggest entertainment form in the world, statistically there are more female gamers than male, and the game industry is still entirely ridiculous and full of comedic potential, and still being considered by many, outside of Japan, as something only for kids and maladjusted adult men. That’s because of the ridiculous and quite frankly shocking, appalling, and ongoing misogyny in the games industry as a whole throughout much of its short lifetime. That’s a whole article in itself.

The games industry in 2024 was estimated to be worth $184.3 billion, dwarfing the combined total of the film industry at $42.5 billion and recorded music at a shockingly poor $28.6 billion, thanks to streaming. I think now’s the time to admit that Lars Ulrich, despite coming across as quite frankly, a total bam at the time (no disrespect to you Lars, but you did), he was kind of right about the future devaluation of music during the whole Napster affair. But I digress and that’s another story for another time. We’re here to talk about games not guys who’ve been dancing on the rotten corpse of their earlier better material for the last 30 years.

At the time of writing, we’ve just had tv shows based on the videogames ‘Fallout’ and ‘The Last of Us’ hit big with critics and audiences alike, an animated movie based on Nintendo’s mascot Super Mario made $600 million at the box office and the Sonic movies just topped $1 billion after Keanu Reeves entered the room as Shadow The Hedgehog in Sonic 3, with number 4 on the way. Hollywood seems to have picked videogames as the next big thing after superheroes. This nonsense is going to be important because studio suits have already greenlit expensive blockbusters based on everything from stuff you’d expect like sci-fi epic ‘Mass Effect’ and a live action version of Nintendo’s beloved fantasy series ‘The Legend of Zelda’ to Ryan Reynolds apparently starring as Dirk the Daring in presumably what will turn out to be a pleasing action-comedy based on 1980s laserdisk classic ‘Dragon’s Lair’. Honestly, if you thought movies were being dumbed down by superheroes and comic books, wait until you see Jerry Bruckheimer’s upcoming ‘Skibidi Toilet’.

So, we’re here to hopefully provide some comic commentary on the current state of the games industry and highlight some of the many hilarious and often questionable stories from the history of games in general, as well as try and provide a Gaming 101, reviews and other nonsense we can think of.

Let’s kick off with a list of some of the best comedy games in no particular order, whether by intention or otherwise these are all worth a play for the chortles alone.

Grand Theft Auto series

Probably doesn’t need an introduction to anybody, but if you’ve somehow managed to get to 2025 without knowing what this is, Scottish game Grand Theft Auto, to which you must always refer as GTA if you wish to fit in with the kids, is a game made by Scottish people, or people resident in Scotland, in Edinburgh, where you get to enjoy being a criminal in a parody of the USA, taking part in a big convoluted serious but daft criminal adventure that usually involves a lot of swearing, shooting polis, often unfortunate rampant misogyny and generally bad behaviour. It’s made in Scotland and is famous for getting the press into a frenzy because its detailed and reactive virtual world encourages the player to commit basic traffic violations and murder, and allows such activities as hiring a prostitute for her services, paying her, then beating her and taking all her pimp’s money, thus sadly ensuring a second beating later on for this virtual hooker. They never mention that it’s also so detailed that you can actually drive safely by following the traffic signals in game, and that you can simply pay the prostitute for her services, and then leave feeling ashamed of yourself, both valuable life skills to learn.

GTA IV actually includes a stand up club in game, where you can watch full stage performances from celebrity terf Ricky Gervais, US comedian Katt Williams and, in the Lost and the Damned dlc, our own local hero Frankie Boyle, who appear in game as themselves.

GTA currently holds Guinness world records for ‘Highest revenue generated by an entertainment product in 24 Hours’ ($815.7 million, about £511.8 million at the time), and ‘Fastest entertainment property to gross $1 billion’. GTA VI is currently due to release at some point this year, and this time features the stunning new innovation of letting you play as a woman for the first time. Hopefully this will be a positive step towards addressing the many issues the series has had up until now with its portayal of women in particular. As usual it’s also made by Rockstar North in Edinburgh and thus is Scottish.

It makes the comedy list for being generally bang on the nose with most of the admittedly broad parody and script, and because the insane amount of detail and realistic reactivity in the game world makes it the closest to a fantasy theme park like Westworld we have with today’s technology except for Rockstar’s own GTA in the wild west series Red Dead. Releasing your inner psychopath in a simulation can be quite therapeutic.

Also there’s no denying that being able to drive about on a mobility scooter shouting crude insults and giving the finger to virtual morbidly obese conservative Americans until they get so incensed they decide to attack you, but you drive away at a slow top speed just too fast for them to catch you due to their said morbid obesity, until, defeated, they give up the chase, only for you to reverse then repeat the whole thing, is fucking hilarious.

GTA is currently available on everything they can think of;

Saint’s Row The Third and Saint’s Row 4

Starting as a decent but derivative clone of GTA with the first game in the series, by the time they’d reached the third game the creators had leaned heavily into the crudity, absurdity, cartoon slapstick ultraviolence and fourth-wall breaking that had proved to be the most popular aspects of the first two titles, if we were considering GTA to be Dr Strangelove level satire this is Scary Movie. No holds are barred with this crude and violent series and no barrel is left unscraped.

This is a game that follows a violent criminal street gang who are also beloved social media and music celebrities; the character creator is so robust it is entirely possible to play as a lingerie clad male or female gang leader, with a Hitler moustache, wearing a cheerleader skirt, who dances like Michael Jackson and has a cockney accent sounding like they are being portrayed by Mick Jagger, channelling his performance as the title character in 1970 British-Australian co-production Ned Kelly, then run down the street in game slapping people with a realistic dildo on a stick, if that’s your thing. Generally puerile slapstick for the most part with some gags that occasionally hit home hard. Special mention must go to the spectacular Jerry Bruckheimer parody opening Saint’s Row IV, where an impromptu alien invasion interrupts the player character, now the President of the United States, from solving the Middle East situation; that same opening’s use of Aerosmith’s worst ever single ‘I Don’t Want to Miss a Thing’ from the licensed soundtrack; and the fact that the standalone Saint’s Row IV Gat Out of Hell is a musical set in Hell.

Saints Row: The Third Remastered is on Xbox Series, PC and Playstation 4/5

Saints Row The Third available on Switch, Xbox 360, PS3 and PC

Saint’s Row II / Gat Out Of Hell available on Xbox 360, Xbox One / Series, PS3, PS4, Switch and PC

The Monkey Island series

This series of puzzle-based adventure games, which began in 1990, opens with main series character Guybrush Threepwood stating ‘I want to be a pirate’, a quest which will lead him into conflict with the ghost pirate Le Chuck, and introduce him to the love of his life, the beautiful Governor Elaine Marley, a strong and more than capable career-oriented woman who thinks he’s an idiot and has no need for him. Creator Ron Gilbert said he was originally inspired by Disney’s Pirates of the Caribbean ride to create a comic pirate fantasy, obviously years before Johnny Depp and the curse of every Halloween party everafter, and this largely plays out like a cross between Pirates of the Caribbean and classic Rob Reiner movie ‘The Princess Bride’ with its own weird surreal groove going on, the most famous sequence in the first game being a series of sword battles which can only be won when the player masters the skill of making witty retorts to insults from their opponents during the fight.

The script and puzzles throughout are filled with comedic situation, parodies of contemporary games, wordplay, puns and sight gags, particularly in the first two games ‘The Secret of Monkey Island’ and ‘Monkey Island 2 – LeChuck’s Revenge’ which were remastered and given a beautiful update and fantastic full voice-over in Special Editions, released in 2009. The third, fourth and fifth games in the series did not involve Ron Gilbert, but ironically, after Pirates of the Caribbean license holders Disney acquired the rights along with the rest of Lucasfilm and LucasArts in 2012, it was the House of the Mouse who were to finally allow him to continue his version of the story after part 2 with 2022’s ‘Return to Monkey Island’, whilst also acknowledging the work of the other creators who’d worked on the series since.

Monkey Island 1 and 2 Special Editons currently available on Xbox and PC

Sid Meier’s Civilization

What’s so funny about this turn based grand-strategy series about managing one of many varied cultures from the dawn of time through history until they are the prevalent on Earth? Modding the game to add new opponents then defending Scotland from a combination of the Daleks; the Cybermen; The Borg; Hitler; Mussolini; Margaret Thatcher and Mahatma Ghandi.

Long term Civ players will be aware of the basic game rule, Don’t Fuck With Ghandi.

Civilisation VI available on PC with mods or Xbox , Switch and Playstation without mods.

I have ADHD and play video games as part of self-management. Writing this article is no longer my hyperfocus, so join me next time for more about the world of comedy and games or whatever else is feeding into my procrastination about cleaning the oven at that point.

Photo: Freddy @Madball' Cricken by S. McS

MADBALL Bring Hardcore Mayhem to a Sold-Out Glasgow Show

Venue: Audio, Glasgow – Sunday 2nd February 2025

New York hardcore veterans MADBALL stormed into Glasgow to a sold out crowd on a cold Sunday night in February, bringing with them the relentless energy and uncompromising aggression that have defined their nearly four-decade-long career. As the third date of their current tour, the NY hardcore legends, fronted by the ever-charismatic Freddy ‘Madball’ Cricien, delivered a blistering set, this was hardcore punk at its purest – raw, aggressive, and utterly unrelenting. 

From the moment Freddy took the stage, the energy in the room was electric as he paced the stage, rallied the crowd, and commanded chaos. Backed by the thunderous basslines of Brendan Porray, the crushing drums of Mike Justian, along with the razor-sharp riffing of Mike Gurnari, MADBALL launched straight into their set which was a relentless onslaught blending old-school classics and newer material. They had something for everyone!

What makes a MADBALL show special isn’t just the music, it’s the connection between the band and their audience. Freddy took several moments throughout the set to reinforce the ethos of respect, unity, and resilience. The Glasgow fans responded with equal passion, proving that this message still holds as much weight today as it ever has.

As the opening chords of ‘HeavenHell’ rang out, the pit was immediately in full force with fists raised and flailing limbs, setting the tone for the rest of the night. ‘Can’t Stop, Won’t Stop’ and ‘Hold It Down’ followed in quick succession before launching into ‘Set It Off’ which caused the energy levels to hit the roof!  

One of the highlights of the night was ‘Smell the Bacon (What’s With You?)’, a nod to their earliest days, proving that even after all these years, they haven’t lost touch with their roots. ‘Lockdown’ and ‘It’s My Life’ maintained the relentless pace, with ‘HC Lives’ serving as a defiant anthem for the dedicated Glasgow crowd. ‘NYC’ and ‘Get Out’ only fuelled the chaos further.

The momentum never wavered, with ‘Freight Train’ and ‘Infiltrate the System’ leading into fan favourites ‘Across Your Face’, ‘Face to Face’, and ‘Born Strong’ while ‘Pride (Times Are Changing)’ and ‘Rev. Up’ showcased MADBALL’s ability to balance aggression with groove before launching into ‘Look My Way’, ‘Down by Law’ and ‘For My Enemies’ which kept the energy at its peak.  Just when it seemed like the night couldn't get any more intense, MADBALL closed with ‘Doc Marten Stomp’, ensuring the gig ended on a high, the entire room was bouncing!

MADBALL’s raw power, uncompromising energy, and a deep-rooted connection to their fans made the bruises and battering we endured well worth it. No gimmicks. No compromises. Just pure, unfiltered, hardcore punk—and Glasgow was all in.

By Smeggy McSmeggerson

INSPIRATIONS AND INFLUENCERS (True Influencers, not the social media talentless attention seekers)

ROD SERLING (December 25, 1924 – June 28, 1975)

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In this month’s edition I’m going to talk about one of my greatest inspirations, and one of the greatest writers of all time, Rod Serling, the creator of the Twilight Zone.  

I grew up watching ‘The Twilight Zone’, an American science fiction fantasy TV show which ran for 5 seasons from 1959 to 1964 (the original black and white ones) and was shown on British terrestrial television in a late night slot during the 1980s before being revived for the first of several times in 1985 after Serling’s death.  

I am a huge science fiction fan and have devoured all the classics such as H.G Wells ‘War of the Worlds’, Pierre Boulle’s ‘Planet of the Apes’, everything by Ray Bradbury and Issac Asimov, but Rod Serling has always stood out as a pioneer as he was one of the first to have his stories adapted for television. 

I had often wondered where Serling got his story ideas from, and in his autobiography he explained that a lot of his ideas came to him in dreams and he would just wake up and write them down, no matter what the time. Now I have a lot of weird and vivid dreams which are story worthy but they never have an ending! 

Rod died at only 50 years old in 1975, which is such a tragedy as  he still had so many more stories to tell.  This was just after his other anthology of short stories ‘The Night Gallery’ was shown on our screens.

A little known fact is that Serling wrote the screenplay for the 1968 Sci-Fi classic ‘The Planet of the Apes’, and in a deviation from Peire Boulle’s original ending to the novel, added the classic scene where Charlton Heston comes across the Statue of Liberty, falls to his knees and says the iconic line which was more iconic than Pierre Boulle's ending...

“You maniacs! you blew it up! Ah, damn you! God damn you all to hell!”

Other tales that have stuck with me are classic ‘Twilight Zone’ episodes which I have watched again and again throughout my life. They dealt with issues that are as relevant today as they were when he first wrote, and had to be done in such a clever way they would beat the censors that operated in accordance with the politics at the time such as racism and war.

Classics such as ‘To Serve man’, which is about aliens who invade earth, and the whole way through the episode you think the aliens are here to serve men, as a book which the Ambassador of the aliens (Kanamit ) has left behind at the UN is called ‘To Serve man’.  What you find out at the end after the majority of people living on Earth decide to go to this alien planet is that the book is actually a cookbook! 

Another classic episode is ‘Eye of the Beholder’ where at the start you see a woman with bandages around her face awaiting the outcome of surgery.  Throughout the whole episode you hear her talking about looking normal, and at the end when the doctor takes of her bandages she looks beautiful by our standards, but not for where she lives where the doctors and nurses and inhabitants of their planet have pig-like noses. It's such an unexpected end and has stuck with me ever since I first saw it.  The closing narrative of this episode is: 

‘Now there're questions that come to mind. Where is this place, and when is it? What kind of world where ugliness is the norm and beauty the deviation from that norm? You want an answer? The answer is, it doesn't make any difference. Because the old saying happens to be true. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, in this year or a hundred years hence. On this planet or wherever there is human life, perhaps out amongst the stars. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Lesson to be learned - in The Twilight Zone

Pet of the month! 

Ronnie Black's dog 

Meet Lola

Lola is a Springador. That's what we call mongrels in Clarkston.

She is a cross between a Springer Spaniel and a Labrador.

My wife said that Lola is the best thing I have ever given her. I did point out that in a roundabout way I gave her 3 children. She still reiterates that Lola is the best thing I have ever given her.

Lola brings a lot of joy not just to my family but was an internet sensation during the first Lockdown.

Every day I would take Lola out for a walk and would post a video on social media regarding what was going on in the world and lots of dialogue between myself and my 4 legged friend. I would often forget to watch Lola doing a poo and would have to search the uncut council grass to find her “Grey Friers Bobby”

Everyone loved seeing Lola on a daily basis.

As we came out of Lockdown I was approached to perform at Tenants Brewery in Glasgow. A charity gig for the Dogs Trust. He said I had been recommended by Viv Gee. I asked if she recommended me as I was one of the best up and coming comedians on the Scottish Comedy Circuit. Unfortunately I was recommended because I had a dug.

This was Lola’s first performance on stage as a double act. I must confess I wrote the vast majority of our set, but she was a great support I was dying on stage she stole the show with some strategic barking and licking.

Lola is now 12 years old and has recently had 12 teeth removed. Unfortunately she doesn’t have a passport or we were off to Turkey to get her new canines.

Lola definitely is a  man’s best Friend.